That may sound dramatic but it’s the truth, and True Blood is one of those shows that I’ve come to regard as a part of my life, over the course of the past six years.
My wife and I met shortly before the series premiere of True Blood, in September of 2008, and we’ve been watching it together since that very first episode.
In other words, the show has been around as long as we’ve been together, and there’s an undeniable sentimental attachment that has come along with that.
The show went from something we enjoyed watching together to a full-blown family affair, bringing everyone together on Sunday nights for dinner and some whacky vampire action. Both my mom and dad developed a taste for True Blood early on, and needless to say those family gatherings only served to further bolster the sentimental attachment that I have with the show.
Sappiness aside, there’s no denying that the show hasn’t always been great, and this final season in particular has admittedly been home to more dull moments than memorable ones.
HBO’s programming director recently revealed that the reason True Blood is coming to an end is because the writers have essentially hit a wall when it comes to the storytelling, and that’s something that was very much evident this whole season – as well as during last night’s lackluster finale.
It’s not uncommon for long-running shows to end with either a wedding or a funeral, and let’s just say that Sookie wore both white and black last night…
After revealing to Jessica that he never got to walk his human daughter down the aisle, and strongly indicating to her that he wants to remedy that through her, before he dies, the baby vamp and Hoyt agreed to tie the knot in a quickly thrown together wedding ceremony, taking place at Bill’s house – and officiated by Andy Bellefleur, of course.
With Jason as Hoyt’s best man and Sookie as the maid of honor, Hoyt and Jessica had the happy ending that I was hoping they would get, and Bill was comforted by the fact that his progeny was going to be well taken care of, in his absence. In fact, he even signed his house over to Andy, making him promise that he’d rent it out to the two young lovers for one dollar per month.
If there’s any storyline that’s been the highlight of Season 7 it’s the Eternal Sunshine-like re-relationship between Hoyt and Jessica, and bringing back Hoyt proved to be one of the smartest things the writers did all season. All seems right in the world of True Blood with them back together, and I even love that Jason ended up having a ‘happily ever after’ with Hoyt’s Alaska girlfriend.
The way all of those storylines worked out and weaved into and out of one another was incredibly well written, and I’m so glad that the show ended on a happy note for all four of those characters. Episode 9 in particular was really well done in the Hoyt/Jessica/Jason/Bridget department, and there’s no doubt that the heart of the entire season has been beating strongest in that unexpected storyline.
As far as the funeral portion of the finale is concerned, we opened the episode with Bill explaining to Sookie why he wants to die, information that he relayed to Eric in Episode 9. Essentially, he feels that Sookie can never be happy as long as he is alive, and he also wants her to expel all of her fairy energy in one massive ball of destruction, so that vampires will never again be drawn to destroying her. Knocking out two birds with one stone, he asks Sookie to use the ball of light on him – to kill him and turn herself human.
After spending much of the episode looking for advice on what to do, which saw her paying a visit to both Jason and Reverend Daniels, Sookie agreed to kill Bill, though she wasn’t cool with killing her fairy-ness in the process. Instead, she snapped a shovel handle in half and staked Bill in the heart, turning his once empty coffin into a Rubbermaid container of blood and gore.
It was an emotional moment, to be sure, as well as the finale’s sole memorable scene. And though I give credit to all involved for having the balls to pull off such a wild scene, I couldn’t help but feel that it just didn’t feel very authentic, or really even make much sense. Maybe it’s just me, but I have a hard time embracing the fact that it was best for Sookie to brutally kill her one true love, and the whole scene felt more like a cheap attempt to shock than a good idea.
During the wedding, it was seemingly suggested that Bill was somehow turning human, as Sookie was able to hear his internal thoughts, for the very first time. It seemed all but set in stone that Sookie’s ball of light was somehow going to turn Bill completely human, thereby making them both human, and I honestly would’ve preferred an ending like that.
It would’ve been pretty corny, for sure, but I just did not at all like the way things ended with those two – especially since we’ve become so invested in their relationship, over the years.
Then again, I suppose there’s no real way for a vampire-human relationship to end happily, so I again must give the writers props for not even remotely attempting that happy ending. It was a visually awesome scene, there’s no denying that, but I don’t think I’ll ever be able to accept either character’s decision as making any sort of logical sense.
Elsewhere in Bon Temps, Eric and Pam double-handedly wiped out the entire yakuza gang with little effort, making me wonder why they didn’t just do that several episodes ago. Burning Mr. Gus alive in Fangtasia’s underground tunnel, the two took control of Sarah Newlin as well as the New Blood product, and in a flash forward in time at the end of the episode we learned that the product has made both of them incredibly wealthy, allowing them to re-open Fangtasia.
While Eric took his rightful place on the throne we first met him on, Sarah Newlin was resigned to her own personal Hell in the bowels of Fangtasia. Though Sarah promised Pam that she’d be her own personal lesbian slave, Pam wasn’t having any of it, chaining her up in the basement and turning her into the world’s most expensive prostitute.
Those with money can pay to drink directly from the source of the cure, and Sarah has been doomed to live out her final days being drank from and haunted by the ghost of her late husband, Steve Newlin. Seems only right, doesn’t it?!
The final scene of the show took place a few years after Sookie staked Bill, and we saw that everyone is living happily ever after. Jason and Bridget are married with three kids, Sookie is pregnant and we’ll never know who the baby-daddy is and every Season 7 couple is still together and happier than ever, including Adilyn/Wade, Lafayette/James, Andy/Holly, Jessica/Hoyt, Sam/Nicole (with child) and Arlene/Keith.
And yea. That’s it. The finale was an altogether lackluster and fairly dull end to what was all around a pretty dull season, which I suppose is quite fitting. It wasn’t one of those finales that will go down in television history as being one of the worst, as there was nothing overly bad about it, but it was hard not to be disappointed by the sheer laziness of it all.
When you invest so much time into a show you hope that it at least ends on a satisfying and memorable note, and I can’t rightly say that the writers accomplished either of those two things. It all just kind of ended with a whimper, and felt more like a season finale than a series finale.
And holy shit did Lafayette get the shaft or what? One of the show’s best characters and his wrap-up was relegated to the ‘fast forward’ scene, which was really just a cheap way for the writers to avoid writing actual conclusions for most of the characters. They took the easy way out, for sure, and it’s again impossible to not be disappointed about that.
It wasn’t a great season, nor was it a great finale, but those who are taking to social media and acting like the past six years were a ‘waste’ are totally missing the point; if you stuck with the show until the end, then I can 100% guarantee it’s because it entertained you a whole lot over the years, and that’s really all that matters at the end of the day.
When I think back on True Blood, what comes to mind will not be the show’s missteps but rather the sheer entertainment it infused into so many Sunday nights for myself, my wife and my entire family, so it ultimately doesn’t matter much to me that the finale wasn’t so good. It’s merely one episode out of 80 of them, and I was entertained by the show a whole lot more than I was anything else.
So thank you for that, True Blood. And I think I speak for most fans – even those who had nothing but bad things to say this entire season – when I say that you will be missed when 2015 rolls around, and you’re nowhere in sight. It’s been a pretty damn fun ride these past six years, and I will forever be grateful that you allowed for my family to bond over exploding vampires, graphic sex scenes and all sorts of other whacky shit.
Nothing but love, True Blood. Nothing but love.
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